Dr. Barbara Fontana, PhD
 
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"Relationships & How to Make Them Work"

Barbara Fontana, Ph.D
45 Route 25A
Shoreham, NY 11786
Ph: 631-821-1880

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the Week
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Barbara Fontana, PhD - Psychologist & Imago Relationship Therapist
Suffolk County, Long Island, New York - Couples Therapy

Tips of the Week for Couples

  • If you truly love another, you will try to meet their needs...

...because their needs are as important to you as your own needs.

  • At the core of love is patience and kindness.

Practice both to keep your relationship loving.

  • Patience doesn't rush to judgment and is slow to anger.

Try to listen to your spouse/partner without judging them or getting angry.

  • Patience understands that we all make mistakes.

Be patient with your spouse/partner when they make a mistake.

  • Negativity kills the safe, loving connection between two people.

It's like throwing water on a fire to put it out. Try to reduce or eliminate the negative comments you make to your spouse/partner. Can you stop being negative for a few hours, a day, a week? Start wherever you can and watch what happens to your relationship.

  • Ask yourself am I trying to meet my partner/spouse's need for sexual intimacy?

To expect him/her to be faithful when you are consistently unwilling to be sexually intimate often causes a rupture in a relationship that grows deeper over months and years. If you are not being sexually intimate, ask your self why and discuss it with your partner/spouse. Seek professional help if you can't resolve this on your own.

  • Ask your partner/spouse - how am I doing at meeting your needs?

Listen without becoming defensive and try to do at least one thing this week that will better meet your partner/spouse's needs.

  • Romance is showing your partner/spouse how much you want and adore him/her.

Do something this week that will show your partner/spouse I want you or I adore you.


Psychologist Shoreham, Long Island | (631) 821-1880